Geeks are Hawt
by superstarultra
Summary: Sometimes it's the most unexpected of people you expect to start hanging out with one another. Crack pairing: Haruhi Suzumiya and Computer Club President. 30 sentences theme.


**Disclaimer: I do not own The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya or any of its characters. I also do not own any of the materials referenced in this story either. This was made for entertainment purposes only and not for profit. So there you go.**

**A/N: CRACK PAIRINGS FTW!!! **

**How did I come up with this? I don't know. But this pairing, unrealistic as it sounds, does possess a kind of twisted appeal. Don't you think? And I prefer to think of him as the Computer Club President. I use the phrase Computer Research Society at one point because it sounds like he's trying to be fancy. **

**Pairing: Haruhi Suzumiya and Computer Club President**

**Theme: 30 sentences**

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**1. Hello**

"Hello, geeks! I've come for an ink cartridge for my printer and I won't take no for an answer!" thundered Haruhi, shattering the tranquility of the neighboring computer room.

**2. Laugh**

"One of these days, Suzumiya! You'll get yours! The Computer Research Society never forgets such an upstart!" the copper-haired boy warned sternly. Haruhi just laughed like a hyena.

**3. Pain**

There were times when he couldn't decide whether she was a power-hungry empress who would bite your head off with a glance or a whiny six-year old who was always used to getting her ways. No matter how he looked at it, Haruhi Suzumiya was a huge pain in the rump.

**4. Webs **

"Do you really expect me to try and understand the tangled webs of your filthy mind?" he asked curtly one day, causing that somewhat catty smile to show up on her face again.

**5. Kiss**

His cheeks grew a lovely shade of red when Haruhi asked him if he'd ever kissed a girl before.

**6. Nerves**

"Sooooooooo... Just what does Yuki help you guys with around here?" Haruhi inquired, playfully kicking her legs back and forth from her chair, while he feverishly typed away at the monitor.

**7. Spiders**

Haruhi's hands were like spiders- always skittering this way and that way whenever she ran them across the top of his skull to bug him.

**8. Hate**

He hated everything about her. He hated her voice, he hated her face, he hated her body, and most of all, he hated the fact that he was starting to actually _like _her constant visits.

**9. Snakes**

He saw that grin and he immediately thought about snakes. Pointed, perfect, icy fangs that embedded themselves right into his timid heart when she spotted him.

**10. Surprise**

He had to admit, he was pretty darn surprised when Haruhi allowed him over as her partner when it came time to play The Day of Sagittarius 4 with the whole Brigade.

**11. Cape**

"You look really funny wearing that cape! Like a character out of Code Geass!" laughed Haruhi from her spot in the captain's seat, while the poor boy hid his face away in the cape's depths.

**12. Kick**

When he had tried to be witty and said that Haruhi had a 'L33T' bra from P.E., the teenage honor student received a second flying kick to the head.

**13. Cute**

"Did anyone every tell you that you look much cuter with your hair cut short?" he said to her one day as she walked out the door with a memory card in hand. Her expression was worth all of the equipment she'd mooched from the room in the past.

**14. Lunch**

Bored of waiting in the spacious clubroom for her friends, Haruhi decided to go eat lunch with her neighbor next door; this simple act continued for the rest of the week.

**15. Pig**

"Hey, Suzumiya."

"Hmmm?"

"You got some chicken on your bottom lip."

"I do? ...Oh."

"Heh. You eat like a pig."

"I do not!"

"You do! It was about the size of my pinky finger! Ha ha!"

"Oh, yeah? Well, your voice SMELLS like a pig! Ha!"

"......What?"

**16. Blackmail**

"Whaat?! What do you mean you threw away the blackmail photos three weeks ago?!"

"You never asked me about them."

And yet, he stayed and didn't say another word.

**17. Jealous**

Kyon couldn't quite place it, but every time he saw Haruhi grab the tie of the Computer Club President and yell at him, he felt a tinge of jealousy in his heart.

**18. Name**

"What IS your name? I kinda forgot it," Haruhi asked bluntly, staring out the room's window, while they played some Othello on a rainy day.

**19. Conclusion**

"Ah ha!" shouted Haruhi, leaping to the top of the table they were seated at in the computer room, "Mr. President, since you are one of the SOS Brigades loyalist vassals, I shall bestow upon you a fabulous opportunity!"

**20. Insanity**

"Really now? And just what would that be?" the boy with blondish hair asked, smirking somewhat at the insane girl towering above him.

**21. Floor**

"The opportunity to allow me to steal away your virginity! Why give it to some random girl, when you could let it be safe with me?" Haruhi beamed brightly, causing her loyal vassal to tumble to the floor in complete shock and horror.

**22. Ice Cream**

He'd once tried to explain the entire plot of Battlestar Galactica to her over ice cream, in the hopes that she'd find it interesting. She'd only cocked her head to the side and said, "You are such a nerd."

**23. Guest**

When she brought him along to attend one of their daily patrols, Mikuru whined and hid behind Kyon and Itsuki. Haruhi gave the red-head a sharp reprimand, saying that's not how you treat a guest.

**24. Online**

The moment Haruhi began to chat with him on an online forum on Myspace, she began to wonder how the rest of the Brigade would look at her now.

**25. Kappa**

"You liar! You said it was a real Kappa! LIAR!!!"

"PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!!!"

**26. Real**

"Do you think aliens, time-travelers, and espers are real, too?"

"I'm not really sure. I'll check my laptop later."

**27. Seat**

"I hereby claim this spot as the new seat of the SOS Brigade's Chief!" cried Haruhi with relish as she plopped herself onto the boy's stunned lap at his main desk.

**28. Ideas**

"You know, Haruhi, with all the time you've been spending over there these past few months, I'm starting to think the rumors are true. About the two of you being in a relationship," observed Kyon as Haruhi got up to go next door.

**29. Shock**

"Oh, come on, Kyon. You really think those stupid rumors are true? I only just made out with him two days ago! Koizumi, you're in charge until I get back. Bye!" smiled Haruhi, her face of mischief highly contrasting with Kyon's mask of shock.

**30. Toy**

"Well, well, Kyon. It looks like Miss Suzumiya has found herself a new toy," said Itsuki with that sugary smile of his. Two seconds later, Kyon's fist smashed right into the esper's face.

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**A/N: There you have it. One of my rare romance fics. It's a funny pairing if you think about it. The Computer Club President is essentially a wimpier version of Kyon. Therefore, Haruhi would have herself an easier time ordering him around. Plus, I can't get the image of Haruhi chasing him around the clubroom with a hungry look on her face out of my head. :) **

**And admit, this is probably the first fic anyone's ever done about the poor guy. He needs some love. Later, my friends!**

**Read & Review! **


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